The Darkness Within

5- I wish I could write something that would change lives

But nothing I write will ever break the ties

Of death and sin around your mind

That’s someone else’s job, not mine.

I will put my soul on paper till my life ends

Because that is where I transcend,

I leave wrong behind and I don’t have to pretend

That my life is perfect, I don’t have to defend,

Myself to anyone around me,

The grace of God surrounds me.

This is where I’m right,

This is why I write.

27- I can pen words that pierce your soul

Because I know

You’re trying to be whole

But making everything ok, that’s not my role.

I will take you to the brink

But its your choice to take a drink

Will Jesus catch you? What do you think?

If he calls you to walk on water, will he let you sink?

42- So, if you’re ready for your life to change,

Then give him the whole paycheck not just your spare change.

Let Jesus begin to rearrange

Everything in your life like Dr. Strange.

So put your picket signs and pride away.

Let the Holy Spirit direct you another way.

Pick up that thing that is your burden to bear

And bring it with you to God knows where.

Come on let’s take a trip inside

Let’s bring your darkness out into the light.

1:05 - Hello darkness, my old friend

Yep it’s me again

No, I’m not here to play your game

No, stop, let me explain

Too long have I sat in your presence

Letting you determine what I can accomplish

Too long have I wallowed in the mires of pity, insecurity, and anxiety,

Depression, anger, doubt, fear,

These are the reasons I’m here.

I’m done with you, this is your eviction notice,

I can move on and be happy I know this,

Now its time for me to move on

And that means that you need to be gone.

1:32 - (Laugh) You think getting rid of me will bring you bliss?

You’ve lost your bloody mind, but fine, let’s do this.

Who do you want to start with?

Let’s see,

There’s doubt and insecurity,

Pain and anger are in here with me,

If they don’t tear you apart then we’ll see how long you last when you get to fear.

You should have brought some weapons cuz there’s more than you can handle in here

1:48 - I doubt

You’ll get out

Before I rip out

And bring about

The end of everything you hold dear.

I’m doubt, and if you don’t shed tears

Before we’re done here

Then you’re still lying to yourself like when you say “only one more beer”

Yeah, don’t try to get around that one

You wanted to bring the fight to me, son

You’re a miserable wretch that can’t be good enough

You’re not strong, you’re not tough,

You always give in at the slightest struggle,

In the wizarding world you’re nothing more than a lowly muggle.

Who cares what you have to say?

Nothing is going to change,

They don’t care about you they care about them

You keep trying to do things for them,

Why do you defend them,

Again and again?

You bear your heart and soul to strangers you don’t even know

You want to reach out like you’re gonna make a mark,

On someone’s life, like you’re gonna create a spark.

But come on, you think you’re really doing anything?

You’re nothing.

Stop trying to find meaning

In other people’s acceptance,

You don’t mean anything to them, accept it.

What makes you think you are important?

Oh, does that hurt?

Sorry, still trying to find your worth?

Reach down, take a fistful of dirt,

Let it slide through your fingers, yeah that’s you and you aren’t going to hear that in church.

2:40 Ah, geez, man, that’s really dark,

Lighten up a little, have a heart,

You know he’s only this far

From completely falling apart.

Why you gotta run around

Tearing everything down?

Aren’t we low enough already, why you gotta bring us lower?

At this point we’re just rippin up floor boards.

No one cares what’s underneath

We should really keep

All this pain to ourselves

No one wants to hear me talk about myself

If we do no one understands,

They’re out on the field and we’re in the stands

Nothing we do really matter anyway

Even though we’re really all the same

I don’t even know what I’m saying

I should just give up and give it over to pain

3:11 (Chuckle) Look at depression trying to make sense of the world

Little does he realize I am the only thing that brings meaning to this world.

Could you ever be happy if you were never sad?

Could you ever know what’s truly good if you didn’t see all that’s bad?

You’ll never know contentment without me,

Could I ease up on you, yeah probably.

But what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger,

I mean, unless I harp on you till you can’t hold on any longer.

You fall down, spiral out of control

Trying to let me go,

But deep down you know,

That I give you purpose,

So all the agony is worth it.

I’m there to hold you in all life’s dark corners

You and I go together like a morgue and the coroner.

What, you wouldn’t call us friends?

Why not? I’m gonna be with you till the bitter end.

And trust me you’ll be bitter every day till then.

Cuz every time open a door, I come in.

Trust someone,

Love someone,

Be real with anyone,

Take care,

Don’t despair,

I’ll be there.

Like I said, I’ll catch you when you fall,

Don’t try to stall

You’re just delaying the inevitable

You’re eternally corruptible

And I love it!

Think you’ll be free of me, I doubt it,

Let’s just be honest,

Pain defines you and you don’t know what you’d do without it,

And there’s nothing you can do about it.

4:10 Huh, you’re pissin him off, that’s funny,

Cuz he’s trying to be angry without me.

Really man, you thought you could call us out without any consequence

That’s just stupid, makes absolutely zero sense

How you gonna stroll up like I don’t exist?

You think I don’t own you, try this,

Every single time you get close to the light,

You run into something that you wanna fight,

Then its you and I

Side by side

Till the day you die,

They have no right

To treat you the way they do

You try to ignore me but I’m no fool

I know how to get to you,

And I know what they’ve done to you.

They don’t get you like I do.

Come on, give em all a little piece of your mind,

You work harder than all of them combined

They don’t know the definition of grind.

And let’s not forget the fact that your own mother left you behind

She didn’t just walk away she threw you aside,

She should have been the one in whom you confide

I know you’ve tried

To get over it and I keep it all locked inside,

But don’t you think you deserve a little bit of respect?

Don’t you wish someone stood up for you before your life was wrecked?

You cling to your God and call him a savior

But from my perspective he hasn’t done you any favors.

He’s a good guy, really?

You don’t have to be a genius to know that’s silly.

Why would he let all of us take control?

Why would he let so many face life alone?

He isn’t fair and he isn’t good,

You say you can’t leave him but maybe you should.

Cuz if he is

Everything that you say he is,

Then people shouldn’t be dying

Children shouldn’t be crying

Parents shouldn’t be lying

Men shouldn’t be trying,

To get in the pants of every woman they know,

Women shouldn’t be hiding,

Feeling like they can never know

If the mind of the man looking back at them

Isn’t just waiting for the perfect opportunity to take advantage of them.

The atrocities of this world should never have come into being,

And finally, so many people are seeing,

That it would be better if we had never existed,

Than to live in a world so screwed up that even God couldn’t fix it.

5:35 Hehe, how have you fared?

Are you scared,

You should be you sorry minister,

I’m insidious and sinister

There’s a reason I’m the finisher

This is not just filler,

This poem is your dying sister and I’m about to finish her.

I’m going to finish you faster

Than Anakin’s master’s

Epic disaster

Killed off every good guy in the galaxy,

Such a tragedy

And this is a travesty

Thinking that you could step up to me.

I am not simply

Some tingly

Sensation on your skin,

I am the source of all your sin.

I own your life

And try as you might,

You will never be right

I keep you safe at night

Because you have me when you don’t have any light.

You bow to your anger, depression, and apathy,

But you better be ready to bend a knee

Cuz all the thing you harbor inside bow to me.

You wouldn’t last a minute without me.

Every day of your life

You think you’ll get by

Without me but that’s a lie

Where would you be without me?

No, honestly,

How far do you think you would have made it without me?

6:18 I raise the hair on the back of your neck

I put your teeth on edge

I pull you back from the ledge

And I put you in your little hedge.

Yeah I hold you back

What kind of stupid statement is that?

Face the fact

We’ll be together till the end of time

I’ll be yours and you’ll be mine

If I didn’t hate love so much we’d be the perfect valentine.

I keep you from ever crossing a line

You’ll never be the best because you might get hurt

It’s better to be safe than face down in the dirt

And of course everyone will leave you because of me

They have no desire to see,

Anything that you can be.

Like doubt said, they don’t care about you they care about them

So if you try you’ll fail and then

You’ll be wrapped up with pain until you cry your eyes out of your head,

Why don’t you let me make the decisions instead?

It should be obvious that you’ll never amount to much

Everyone says you can be anything but that is such

An awful lie,

And you’ll probably die

Before you come close to any kind of success,

So stop trying, give it a rest.

Drop faith like a baby bird from the nest

God asks an awful lot

And if you keep following him you’ll never get to the top

Not that you would anyway

No one likes you, no one will stay,

They’ll all reject you, even if they don’t say.

You’ll never be great, you’ll never be loved, you’ll never be accepted

The best you’ll ever be is simply tolerated.

So sit there in your cage and be a good little pet

Maybe one day you’ll get

A chance to roam on a leash

But you’ll never be free

Cuz all on your own you’ll never overpower me.

You might have a gift and someone might hear you, that might be true and

All

But the biggest crowd you’ll ever attract are the people that show up at your funeral.

What are you shakin for?

You started this war.

What you can’t handle it?

Wow, you really are pathetic.

What you thought you’d just walk in and tell us all to leave?

What is this Tel-Aviv?

We don’t get frequent flyer miles

We don’t get to travel, that isn’t our style.

You think we don’t know that we make your life hell?

You think you’re worth anything without us? you must be under a spell.

I’m sorry that doubt beat you down,

And anger kicked you when you were down,

Pain just wants you to drown

They broke your ribs and kicked you around

But come on, stop crying, get up out of the ditch

Pick yourself up and stop being a little –

7:55 Enough! Alright,

He doesn’t have the strength to fight

He’s a child of mine,

A child of the light

And the smartest thing he did was bring you outside

To face the light

He doesn’t have room for you in this life.

I AM the way the truth and the life

And where there’s life there’s light

And now it’s time

For all of you to take a hike.

If you think I wanted you here you’re mistaken

I created the world for them but it was taken

By you, and you have the audacity

To point your fingers at me

And claim that I screwed up,

Boy, that’s messed up.

I love these people, every tongue and every nation

When they come to me they are a new creation

I cleanse them, body and spirit,

I call out to them even when they don’t hear it.

They should know that they don’t have to walk in darkness any longer,

And by coming to me on their knees, they can be made stronger.

Your faith has made you well,

And if you couldn’t tell,

I am the only one that can deliver you from this hell.

You think I am blind to all that goes on in the world?

You think I’m not with you when you’re sucked into the whirl,

Wind, that is pain and suffering?

If you believe that you have another thing coming.

Open up that dusty Bible and look into my word,

I am the first and the last, I own this world if you haven’t heard.

You justify not listening to me because I don’t end all the pain you feel in a moment

And you can’t seem to see that that is such a faulty argument.

My strength is made perfect in you in your weakness

My grace is sufficient for you, why can’t you see this?

I don’t want you to better, I don’t want you to perform,

I don’t want you to go along and conform to the norm.

I don’t need you to fix yourself before you come to me

I hope that by now you see

That if you fight darkness with darkness you will always fail,

And it will always be a bloody trail,

Of tears and selfish agony,

That’s not the path I want you on because it leads you away from me.

I didn’t commission you to storm the gates of hell

I said if you stand on my promises in the storm then hell will not prevail.

Look my servant whose no longer a servant but a friend,

Have you gotten enough pleasure out of torturing him?

You cannot stand before me,

Because I stand before eternity,

And that is something you cannot comprehend

With a single word I can end,

Your entire existence

I’ve seen all you can do, I’ve examined the evidence,

And ending you before your time would not do them justice

You’ve stolen so much of my love from them, why don’t you chew on this,

For every single thing that you have done,

You will spend eternity answering for, because the truth is I have already won.

Death and darkness are no more,

Because at the cross I took away all of your power.

So you would do well to cower,

Because this is your final hour,

In the light of eternity you have no place

And when they finish the race,

I will right every single wrong

So be gone!

You don’t belong.

Compassion will subdue anger, grace will overpower doubt,

And love, perfect love, will cast out all fear,

So none of you have any right to be here.

In me,

They are perfect, righteous and redeemed,

I have loosed the strands of death and you have no say in the matter,

I have taken all their sins, and I have lovingly scattered,

Them as far as east is from west,

I have promised them eternal rest.

And just as east and west will never meet,

So are they and condemnation, they are free.

They no longer answer to you, you answer to me.

So come, state your case, but this battle cannot be won with reason,

Because I created reason and therefore reason cannot hold a candle to me, it’s treason.

You would take my creation and use it against me?

That’s cowardice at its finest and now I hope you see,

That you don’t have a leg to stand on, anything that you throw at me,

Is simply using what I have given you to try to undermine me.

The best you can do is undercut, destroy, and kill

But nothing you can do can negate my Father’s perfect will.

I created life,

All you create is strife,

Using the materials at your disposal

Trying to paint me in a bad light, but I hope they reject your proposal.

Come unto me all you who are weary and heavy laden,

My burden is light, my yoke is easy, it’s time for you to trade in,

The life of fear you’ve been living in,

It’s time for you to see that all of the sin,

Is no match for me because I can make you new again.

Maybe you thought this would be easy,

But that’s not what it means to follow me.

Call on my name and I will deliver you

I will make you new,

You will have the power to meet your demons face to face

Stand firm in my love for you and let me put them in their place.

You don’t need doubt, you don’t need, anger, you don’t need fear, all you need is grace.

You are my child you are not a waste.

My strength will be your strength

Don’t hold me at arms length.

Let me in

And let me show you the power of love again and again.